Yee Haw!

I want to just title all my blogs "Provisions!" because God is so good to provide! But alas, I try to be creative.  You'll understand the title here shortly.

Michael has accepted a wonderfully, fabulous job as a simulator instructor for the KC-135. He's been wanting to get back to teaching, back to working with the military, and back to his beloved aircraft. An opportunity was placed on his lap and he accepted.  The job is in Altus, Oklahoma, at Altus Air Force Base. Three-fourths of the Corsar's are staying in North Carolina until Evan graduates high school in 9 months while the other 1/4 of us is living out west. We'll all join him in June next year.

Michael drove a company car when he lived in North Carolina, so there was no vehicle for him to take to Oklahoma.  Funds were all locked up to pay for his move and setting up an apartment, so there were no funds for a vehicle for him for a while.  He had resigned that he would ride his bicycle to work and home. He worked out ways to ride to grocery stores every few days to only buy what would fit in his backpack.  It would be an inconvenience, but it was literally his only choice.

(Side story time because our stories of provision always have a back story God has been working on  for some time.) Michael's sister, Jaime who lives in Omaha, is married to Jenean. Jenean's family lives in Altus, Oklahoma. Jaime told her father-in-law, Jim, that her brother was moving to town and gave him Michael's phone number.   Jim called Michael and invited him to church with he and his wife on Sunday, picked him up, introduced him to tons of people, and they all took him to lunch after church!  Of course, my extrovert husband was in heaven having tons of new people to talk to! At lunch, Jim discovered  Michael doesn't have a vehicle right now, so he offered Michael his "hay-bale" truck to use until he gets something of his own.  The only caveat is Michael has to come out to the farm once a week with the hay-bale truck and help Jim feed the cows and horses.

If you know Michael, this story is pretty comical because he is 100% city boy. There is not a country bone in his body. But Jim's Christ-like generosity touched him so much, that he agreed to the terms!

(Those spikes on the back are what crack me up, but apparently they are on hydraulics that come down to pick up the hay bales.)  

Michael has not only been provided transportation, but he has a family who cares for him, feeds him, and values him and he's only been there for one week!  A family that God had been putting into place in our lives long before He called Michael  to move to Altus, Oklahoma.

God may not provide in ways we think He should provide, but He 100% provides in ways we NEED Him to provide.

When I see my husband in a month, he may be wearing camouflage and chewing on straw when he picks me up in this miraculous truck, but YEE HAW! God is good!

"And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others."

         2 Corinthians 9:8

Great is His Faithfulness

I haven't blogged much this year.  And though it's not a good excuse, life just gets so busy. And I've really struggled with mood and motivation this year, if I'm completely honest with you.  Getting older does things to ya, ya know?  I've actually spent tons of time with my Father this year in so many ways.  Things have just been so personal, that I haven't wanted to blog about them.  Although I probably should have done so in my spirit of transparency.

This week, though, I am so overwhelmed by emotions and the goodness of God and I just can't contain it all in my body any longer!  It must come out on paper...or a screen, you know what I mean!

Last week, my neighbor went to be with Jesus following a few days in the hospital after a massive stroke.  I was listening to a podcast about grieving widows after that happened and a certain widow's testimony really struck me.  Before her husband died she asked God for help, and His answer was "Praise Me." She was angry that was how God had chosen to answer her because she was praying for healing!  Being obedient she began to praise God and even though her husband died, the praise is what sustained her through the grief.  I've been meditating on that concept all week.  Little did I know it would be preparing me.

While my neighbor was in the hospital, my dad's older sister, my Aunt Nola, whom I love dearly and has always been such an encouraging rock in our family, was put in the hospital struggling with kidney failure and a plethora of other health issues.  My dad has been by her side for weeks now. Her children came in knowing it might be their final farewells. Today my dad tearfully called me saying today was probably going to be her last day day due to some complications. I cried out to God and asked Him to give me a song so I could praise Him as I grieved.

Silence.

I made my breakfast and sat down to do my bible reading for the day, and that's when God gave me my song, because "If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find Me." Jeremiah 29:13  The Psalms overwhelmingly reminded me of God's eternal faithfulness and steadfast love through the ages.  Great is His faithfulness. He gives strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow!  Both my children are reading in the Psalms right now, and Evan commented the other day that most of the songs we sing in church come right out of the Psalms.  I love when God shows up to my kiddos!

I had been feeling discouraged because I had been fervently praying for miracles and healing for both my neighbor and for my aunt.  I felt my prayers had fallen on deaf ears as it seems God did not answer either of my prayers.  James 5:16 says "The prayers of a righteous man avails much"...so maybe I'm just not so righteous.  But then I began to walk through my mind of all the times God has been faithful.  Faithful to my family in providing a legacy of faith, faithful to me to provide me with such amazing neighbors who always have our backs, faithful to my children to be their good Father, faithful to my husband to provide financially for our family, and the list goes on and on and on!

"The love of God is greater far than tongue or pen can ever tell.  Could we with ink the ocean fill and were the skies of parchment made? Were every stalk on earth a quill and every man a scribe by trade. To write the love of God above would drain the ocean dry. Nor could the scroll contain the whole, though stretched from sky to sky. "~Hymn "The Love of God" 

This afternoon, my Aunt Nola also entered the presence of Heaven.  As my dad texted me, "She is looking into Jesus' eyes right now." What a comforting fact that she is now healed.  My neighbor is  also now healed.  God did answer my prayers. I am righteous because Jesus made me righteous through His death and resurrection, so my prayers did avail much. Great is His faithfulness unto me.

I'm so thankful that the faithfulness of our great God allows me the hope to hug my neighbor Jim and kiss his cheek when I get there, and the joy when my Aunt Nola is standing at the gates of Heaven when I arrive to show me around and introduce me to everyone. God is so good to us.

Found

Written July 2018: Taken from another blog I wrote and added to this one



“You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord.” Jeremiah 29:13-14

Every momma’s prayer is that God will find her children and never let go. In her years and years of seeking hard, God finally allowed Alex to see Him. It’s the coolest story. Ready?

In 2016, Alex went on a mission trip to Ukraine pretty much kicking and screaming.  She adamantly stated she did not have a calling for missions and this trip was a “waste of time”, but she agreed to go because her dad was heading up the team.  She found herself repentant after spending just a few days at youth camp with these Ukrainian people.  She fell in love with them, in love with the country, in love with the mission, and gave in 100% to the overwhelming call she was feeling.  It was literally from darkness to light.

Receiving a calling doesn’t necessarily mean God lays out everything in a nicely tied package for you.  For 2 years, Alex has sought God in the deepest ways with what she is to do with her life.  She has prayed and received no clear answer, she has searched the scripture, she has read books about God’s will, she has sought counsel with no peace in the answers.  We have reminded her over and over again that God will reveal what He wants from her in His timing.  Just keep seeking, keep praying, keep walking toward the call that you feel so strongly in your heart. Wrestling with God and begging Him to give her answers has been exhausting.

After a few months from high school graduation with no direction and no future plans, she was really downcast and confused.  She felt everyone else in life knew exactly what they wanted to do with their future, but she had no idea.  We began the admission process as a non-degree seeking student to The College at Southeastern so she could take a few classes with the hopes of God opening clear doors. The only thing she knew for sure was that she wanted to return to Ukraine because she felt such peace when she was there. She was finally able to return to Ukraine July 2018. Her heart was now captured and encouraged even more, and the calling was been stamped even harder on her soul. Upon her return home from a great week with her Ukrainian family and having spent an exceptional time in the presence of God, she had decided that she wants to return to Ukraine to teach English as a second language for those youth who can’t afford to take English classes. That is something more reserved for the wealthier children in that country and she feels called to minister to the least of these. She feels adamant that she is to return there and immerse herself in the culture, be ready with the language, and have the heart to do whatever God readies her to do. Her graduation mantra that she painted so beautifully on the top of her graduate cap said, “If the wind goes where You send it, So Will I.”

Just a week home and she began searching all the options of how to get back to Ukraine, how to obtain a student visa, how to afford living there (even though she has a Ukrainian family who already has agreed to let her live with them), downloading apps to further learn the language, finishing her application for admission to Southeastern, and so forth.  She has been praying diligently and the answer that keeps coming back to her is teaching English. While she has been busy with all the aforementioned things, I found an opportunity for her to teach ESL with the refugee ministry here in Raleigh.  She emailed the director and they will be more than happy to have her gain experience teaching a small group there.  But then we questioned “how” exactly do you teach English to those wanting to learn?  There has to be some classes somewhere to learn how to teach it. So tonight, as I’m scrolling through Instagram, I happen across Southeastern’s page that says: “Do you have a desire to reach the nations with the gospel through teaching English?” Lo and behold, Southeastern is now offering a Teaching English as a Second Language certificate. It even laid out the classes for this Fall and the classes for the Spring to complete the certificate.

So, as Alex has blindly walked in faith going the direction the Spirit has led her, God has, in one week’s time, given her a clear direction and even laid out the schedule of events for her to complete the task.  She will take the certificate classes at Southeastern to learn how to teach English, all while gaining the experience of teaching English to refugees. Then I know in my heart that God will swing open wide the opportunity for her to return to Ukraine. Our family verse in Psalm 37:23 says, “The Lord directs the steps of the godly and He delights in every detail of their lives.” Earlier in that Psalm it says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

As Alex said to me tonight in joyful tears, “I now see how when you follow God in obedience, He literally lines up everything for you when it’s time.”

“I will be found by you, says the Lord.” 

Spring

We are emerging from a super long winter.  And I'm not necessarily talking about the physical season of winter, but more like a spiritual season of winter.  Those spiritual seasons sometimes coincide with the physical seasons for me.  I struggle with SAD (seasonal affective disorder) where my mood drastically changes with the seasons.  Flowers die, leaves fall and my mood disappears with it; I become more contemplative in the cold months and more introverted and quiet.  Then, as the spring comes I emerge from my slumbering den ready to plant and create and be social again!

I have to admit, I kind of like that I was created that way.  I enjoy my contemplative times in the winter months when I can sit and be still and hang out with God.  I crawl up in His lap next to the fireplace every day and I really enjoy those times.  In the spring and summer months, my time with God is still present, but we are outside creating together and enjoying His creation.

What does this have to do with anything?  Well, let me explain.  Michael was laid off from his amazing, well paying job unexpectedly December 1.  There was so much going on in our lives at that time and losing a job was not a welcome experience right then and there.  We kind of hydroplaned through the busy-ness of December bracing for the stillness of the holiday season so that we could plummet into the hard brick wall of a spiritual and emotional winter.  My SAD usually hits around the January time frame and it hit hard this year.  God and I had many talks by the fireplace about what in the world He was doing?!  Had He forgotten we had just purchased a home?  A large home for which to do ministry for Him?  Had He forgotten that Michael just graduated? Had He not looked ahead on our calendar and noticed that we have a senior graduating from high school this year?  There are lots of things to be paid for senior year, God, in case you didn't know that's how we humans do things. AND God decided to move us to another church family in the middle of all this making it really hard for me to stay in my comfortable shell during this most challenging time.  The literal feeling of drowning and suffocation.  Combating the human fear of losing our home, and questioning ALL that you thought God was doing in your life before He brought it all to an abrupt halt.  Do we stay in North Carolina?  Do we look for work elsewhere?  We were 100% certain of the open doors He put in front of us when we moved to this house in March 2017.  What in the world are we to do God?!

Silence. That was His answer.

Understanding faith with your heart is one thing.  It's a sweet, Christian sentiment we listen to in a sermon on Sunday. But actually living out faith with your head is another thing entirely.  It's not something we humans have genetically built into us.  You have to ask for it every day from the Spirit who guides you.  The Spirit is the only thing that helps our unbelief.  We don't just muster it up on our own.  Believe me, I tried.  And I failed.  Miserably.  I was Job's wife to my husband.  I whined and pouted like a whiny child to my Father.  I failed to see His provisions on a daily basis...as I lived in a huge house, by the way.  Let the ugliness of my heart and the coldness of my winter sink in here.  

Then my eyes were opened to see that He was with us fighting our battle, making all things new, providing for us. We never went hungry or without.  My worship became sweeter.  My children's faith became deeper.  Michael was able to minister to friends and his children over breakfasts, lunches, and date nights in his "free time" of waiting. We made the most of it and had friends over for dinner and fellowship.

God's name became to me The Lord of Hosts, God Almighty.  I meditated on Psalm 46 every day, then I found the song "Psalm 46" by Shane and Shane and listened to it a thousand times a day!  "Though oceans roar, You are the Lord of all, the One who calms the wind and waves and makes my heart be still. Though the earth gives way, the mountains move into the sea, the nations rage, I know my God is in control!" I began to see the evidence of His love for me all around in even the mundane things of life.  I listened for His answers to my heart's cry in nature, in His Word, in the words of Christian friends and family, in articles I would read. He is literally everywhere when you seek Him with your whole heart. I finally gave in to whatever He caused to happen and it would be okay.  If we move, okay. If we lose the house, okay. If we stay, okay. If He calls us to do something that makes no sense at all, okay. If He's clear with His directions, great.  If not, He's Sovereign, and it's okay.

Then, after 4 months of rejection emails, one company found Michael and pursued him.  He will start next week as Regional Operations Director of ProSource of Raleigh. He will then branch out with their company in Charlotte and Savannah, GA. He's doing basically the same job he was doing before his layoff for another company.

It's not lost of me that the first day of Spring was last week.  The Lord of Hosts, Jehovah Sabaoth, God Almighty fought our way through the winter for us. One of the studies I did through the winter said this:

"To summarize, the LORD of hosts, Jehovah Sabaoth is the Name of God we find used in Scripture when a man or woman is at the end of their rope so to speak -- Jehovah Sabaoth is the Strong Tower which God has made available for those times when we fail & are powerless, when our resources are inadequate, when there is no other help. And it is especially during those times that one comes to appreciate that God is truly the LORD of the Armies & of all hosts. In short, Jehovah Sabaoth speaks of God's available power in our time of trouble."

We don't know what the future holds with this company, with our ministry, with our family.  But we are in 100% with whatever God puts out for us to do.  He has shown time and time again that He does not fail, He does not forget us, He provides, He upholds, He is compassionate, He loves deeply, He fights for us. Most importantly, He's WITH US. Through thick and thin. Through winter and spring.

Evidences of Grace

Birds.  They are my most favorite thing to decorate with.  They have been my mascot during our seminary years. The Bible tells us in Matthew 6:25-27 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear.  Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?  Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them.  Are you not much more valuable than they?  Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" God always brings birds to remind me that He is near and that all is well.

Our family is in the process of changing churches.  We have been in our current church for the past 4.5 years, but within the past few months we have felt a prompting of the Spirit to join the ministry of another local body of believers.  This has not been an easy task to obey as we love the church in which we have been a part and we love the people there who have become like family during our seminary years.

It has taken much prayer, discussion, and trying to figure out why God would move us out of our support network to join another church at this particular time in our life.  We are still waiting for God to reveal that, although we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are walking the path God has laid out before us.

At our new church, Imago Dei (which simply means Image of God in Greek) each member joins a growth group which is a small group that meets in homes throughout the week.  They provide a list of quite a few growth groups with the notion that you would visit a lot of them until you find one that you most enjoy going to.  I was not looking forward to visiting a ton of groups for the next few months because I just really wanted to find a group quickly and start making friends and feeling connected.  Visiting a ton of groups was causing me quite the amount of anxiety.

Michael has been unemployed since November 30 and adding more anxiety on top of that already anxiety provoking situation seemed so daunting to me.  When we are anxious what are we to do?

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication make your requests known to God..." Philippians 4:6 

So, we began to pray for God to direct our steps and lead us into the right group and help us connect...and to take away the anxiety we were feeling about leaving one church for another. So much anxiety...just take it away!

We found a group one Thursday night and decided to check it out.  The people were all super friendly and we enjoyed the way the group was run.  But then God showed me that He had led us to the perfect group.  We were sitting in the group and were asked to talk about "evidences of God's grace" to us during the week.  Each person told of some way that God had blessed them that week, or even told of challenges they were facing and how God was still ever present in those challenges.  (Being a Christian does not fully mean life is rosy 24/7). As people were sharing evidences of God's grace and I was thinking of what I possibly had to share because life is horrible and Michael doesn't have a job and we are having to worry about provisions, and so forth... a gal leaned forward revealing to me a piece of art on canvas hanging on the wall behind her.  It was this picture:

Don't you know I immediately knew God was there.  In my trial, in that house prompting me that this is where we were to be.  Reminding me that He is our provision and that life is NOT horrible because look at all the evidences of My grace that is ALL AROUND YOU!

The following week I spent the whole week focusing on God's daily graces to me and my family and not thinking about the "negative" things.  We had growth group that week at another member's house and lo and behold, she had a picture of a bird in her bathroom. That bathroom then became a holy room to me as I thanked God for showing me His presence and thanking Him for changing my mindset to one that focuses on blessings.

I love ALL the places God shows up. I'm looking forward to spring when birds will be everywhere!  Isn't God good?!

Come and see...

Exactly a year ago, I wrote a blog heralding the amazing thing God had done in giving Michael a fabulous job in an amazing Christian company making a great salary!  A job that came to him without him even looking for it. God fighting for us behind the scenes and giving us exactly what we needed at that moment, all in His sovereignty and timing.  When I posted it for friends to read, I wrote "Come and see what God has done." Because, hey, we all want to see the amazing ways in which God provides, right?

Fast forward a year later to when that job was taken from Michael after new management eliminated his position without any warning. I still want friends to read this and think, "Come and see what God has done."

God leads me to Habakkuk right now. Habakkuk prayed in complaint wanting God to judge the wicked.  Wanting to know why evil abounds and why God allows it? Habakkuk 1:5 gives God's reply, 

"Look at the nations and watch and be utterly amazed.  For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told." 

Sounds a lot like "Come and see what God will do"...right?  Sounds like God is going to get them out of this evil mess and make everything happy rainbows again.  Except it wasn't something wonderful and warm and fuzzy that God was going to do that would utterly amaze him.  He was going to bring destruction on His people and judge them using their enemies to enslave them in order to get rid of the wicked.  The things that will "utterly amaze" us are not always things we consider to be "amazing". Sometimes they are painful and confusing to us.  But they are done to bring glory to the matchless name of God and that is always AMAZING...regardless of how it's done.

So we are vulnerably showing you the "utterly amazing" thing God has done in allowing Michael to be laid off of a great job.  We are allowing you to walk with us as we pray to not lose our home, as we wait on God's provisions for a new career, as we walk through happy holidays with a saddened spirit, as we try to live by faith and NOT fear.  We know God will be glorified through this utterly amazing turn of events.  We don't understand it, but we know God promises good for us and He will always be faithful.

Living in the promise of Ephesians 3:20, "Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think."

Come along with us and see what God has done!

Seven

November 30, 2010.  Michael's official last day of work with the US Air Force.

November 30, 2017.  Michael's last day working at Majestic Kitchen and Bath Creations...a job that God lovingly dropped in his lap a year ago when he desperately needed a job.  And a job he thought he would be working at for many years to come.

With a new job and a new income in our path, we purchased a large home with room to expand a hospitality ministry, take in foster children, bring over exchange students, house seminary students, and so forth.  The ideas were endless and still flow through our mind rampantly!  Our new income helped us give generously to family, to those in need, and to different mission trips and ministries where God led us to give.  It helped to fund his last year of seminary, which he graduates from in one week.

We are still unsure why the layoff occurred.  Michael had been doing a great job managing people, giving selflessly to his company, going in after hours to complete tasks to make the company better, giving people raises who needed to better support their families, giving advice to young workers who needed help with budgeting and getting better living situations, building relationships amongst employees to better the work environment.  So, when he was called in and laid off due to company restructuring, it was quite the kick in the gut.  Now, we sit today, still dumbfounded trying to make sense of something that isn't going to make sense.  We are trying to determine if all God has given to us will now disappear or if God will do something miraculous and continue our vision forward.  We are to the point where THE only option is for God to come through.  I have cried to him for 24 hours now and laid my heart bare.  Michael is walking with such faith, that God brought us here and will NOT leave us stranded.  We literally are walking blind with what is next.  I have strong faith, but this...this is scary.

But the dive to the deep definitely makes you press into the arms of the Savior.  Not that we hadn't been in His presence already, but the deep, dark depths somehow make Him even more prevalent and real. And I'm happy to sit in the dark with His arms wrapped around me.  I'm happy to embrace this every time it happens to us.

Seven years ago, when Michael left the Air Force, we were unemployed for 6 months!  Dark, depths for 6 months.  But we never missed a house payment, we never went hungry, it was over Christmas and our kids still had gifts.  God showed up BIG time through the hands of fellow believers.  (If you want to read those AMAZING stories, go back to when I first started my blog in 2010).  Not sure why 7 years later we are here again.  But I know it is for God's glory and for our good.  And that's all that matters to me.  Seven is the biblical number for "completion". Not sure what we've completed, but I can't wait for God to reveal it!

This little story below "showed up" on my newsfeed 7 years ago during the exact same trial.  It was written by comedian Jon Acuff, whom I adore!   And of course, it showed up again today in my memory feed.  So, I wanted to share it today with all the "deja vu" that's going on in our life today!  :)

"A few months ago, my five year old, McRae told me, “The biggest number I know of is 26.” At the end of her understanding of numbers was the number 26. In her mind, that was really how big numbers come. If you wanted to describe how far the moon was from earth, probably about 26 miles. Want to say how long it felt to wait for Christmas to get here? It was like 26 minutes! Number of pieces of candy she estimates she got for Halloween? 26. It’s her biggest number. Until that is, I told her about 27. And blew her mind. 

She’s not great at “sizing” things. But that’s OK, she’s 5. She’s pretty sure fairies are real. She’s convinced every dog in the world would like to meet her. The other day at Costco she saw a man with a white beard and proceeded to yell to everyone in the store, “Santa is shopping here today! He. Is. Here. Today!!” That’s OK behavior for her. She’s just a kid. She’s little. 

But oddly enough, she’s not the only one who tends to get sizes all twisted. She’s not the only one who tends to “under size.” In fact, I think lot of us do that, especially when it comes to God. I learned this last year when the Stuff Christians Like community raised money to build a kindergarten in Vietnam. On a random Monday, I asked readers to help me raise $30,000 and that honestly made me nervous. It’s weird to ask for money. It changes your intimacy levels. It’s like actually holding hands during couples skate at Roller Kingdom in Hudson, Massachusetts. Sure, you might skate around in circles with Stacy Valentino listening to Bobby Brown’s “Tender Roni,” but holding hands is a whole nother level. (That example got really specific and 7th gradery.) But it’s true, asking for money is awkward, which is why pastors do the money disclaimer when they preach. They start their sermon by saying, “I never normally preach about money, I never preach about tithing, except today.” And that’s always the Sunday your neighbor or coworker finally agreed to come to church with you. Your friend always comes on the money Sunday or the day the mime group, “Gloves of Love” is there to perform. 

So I was anxious about asking for money. And I honestly thought it would take us 6 weeks to raise $30,000. But if you’ve read this site for a while, you know that was not the case. We raised all $30,000 in a matter of 18 hours. It took us less than a day to complete the entire campaign and I realized I had been like McRae with the number 26. 

Here’s what I essentially said to God before the project started: “God, you are massive. You are huge. You made the universe and created all space and time. You are without end! But, you are slightly less big than $30,000. You’re like a really solid $29,000 God. And that’s awesome. I mean that’s pretty good. I think you’re almost all powerful, you’re just not $30,000 powerful.” 

Have you ever done that? Have you ever been faced with what felt like an insurmountable challenge and in the midst of that, you’ve worshiped a really small God? Have you ever prayed something like: “God, you are gigantic. You rule the universe. You’re just not as big as my college application process. You are slightly too small to handle that.” 

Or “God, I love you. You are massive and supreme. You are huge, except you’re not big enough to handle my divorce. You are smaller than this experience.” 

Or “God, you are like the real He-Man, you are master of the universe! You are so big and so all knowing, except you probably don’t know how to handle my job search. You’re big, you’re just slightly tinier than my unemployment.” 

No one would actually prays those words, but that’s what flows from our heart when we allow doubt to set up shop. That’s how we live when we feel like we’ve got to force things to happen or they never will. That’s what happens when we under size God. The truth is, God is bigger than $30,000. God is bigger than a divorce. God is bigger than unemployment. God is bigger than a teen daughter who swears she doesn’t love you. God is bigger that money problems. God is bigger than our biggest dreams. 

And I thank God that he is. I think sometimes we want him to be pocket-sized and manageable. I’ve heard people say things like, “I want a God who can explain to me why bad things happen to good people.” I understand that frustration, I do, but here’s the thing. I don’t want a God who ever has to fit within my understanding. I don’t want a God who is limited by mind and my experiences. I want a big God. A God that spans generations and space and time. 

I don’t want a God who needs my approval or comprehension to do something big. This holiday season, as the birth of Christ is remembered, let’s celebrate our big God. Let’s honor a huge, wild, unable to be controlled by our small minds God. He’s bigger than that thing you worried about or dreamt about."