Most of you know our Air Force history. Michael valiantly served as an exemplary pilot for 10 years. He gave it his all. He was awarded for numerous things, events, activities. His whole identity was wrapped up in his career and what the Air Force made him. Pride comes before the fall, is the saying. Is that biblical? A proverb? I'm certain it is...will have to look that up later. Michael has been out of the service now for 2.5 years. I write about it a lot because it was a traumatic loss for our family! You get used to things being done a certain way and then, it's ended. It's a little surreal. We were used to the Air Force determining our destiny. Telling us where to go next and what to do. God had a hand in putting a screeching halt to that when we got out. It was at that moment that Michael fully surrendered, recklessly abandoned everything to follow only what God wants for our life. Easy? NO! It's quite the traumatic experience. It probably could have been peaceful if we hadn't been kicking and screaming the whole way.
So, here we sit quite a few years into our "new" life. Michael has tons and tons of military uniforms and paraphernalia in our attic. He was fine having it sit there for the past 2 years. Evan, is of course, enamored with all this militaria. So, Michael decided to get it all down the other night, go through it, and determine what he should keep and what he could get rid of. He pulled it all down, then had to leave for a meeting. So, Evan pulled EVERYTHING out. Beaming with pride to see his dad's awards, the uniforms, the patches. Michael got home from his meeting and Evan had a ton of questions for him about all these military stuff littering my living room! Michael sat patiently and answered every one of Evan's questions about every item he pulled out. Then, we put the kids to bed.
I then found Michael sitting in the living room amidst all the remains of his old life. He had tears streaming down his face as he held some flight instruments. He sat there telling me how hard it was to see all this stuff again because it was such a deep part of him. He told me how he foolishly made all that his identity for so long. This military life that he wanted to invest in just came to a screeching halt in 2010. He cried grieving the "old" life. The man he used to be.
God pulled him out of that life because God had a better calling for him. God wanted to use Michael in a way that the Air Force would not allow. God was going to make Michael a new man. And he's been chiseling away at him for the past few years now. Chiseling is a painful process. It calls for sacrifice, selflessness, humility, putting God's ways above our own.
The song that has been resonating in my soul for a while now is "New Man" by All Things New. Wow. What a song. I'll share it with you. Hopefully it helps you to quite grieving the "old man", but reminds you that God has made you into a new creation. A way better model of what you were before!
God reminds us constantly that we are His! Set apart for great things. Praying God restores my husband's heart and reminds him that his identity is not in his old man, but in what God has made him to be. And watch out world for what's coming!
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