Friday, December 24, 2010

Christmas Eve Gift

Christmas is rooted with so many traditions.  So many ways that our family does things they may be totally different from your family.  When I was a kid, I had the best Santa in the whole world!  I would hear him land on my roof, I would hear jingle bells, and I would hear things in my house.  All while hiding under my covers giggling because my parents would remind me that Santa wouldn't stop unless I was asleep.  Ah, the memories.  These are traditions I try to carry on with my own kids.  They, too, have a wonderful Santa in their lives.  We wake them up every year to see Santa with our own eyes in our house putting gifts under our tree.  They are now starting to realize, though, that dad never seems to be around when this occurs.  Hmmmm.....
I truly love Christmas!  I love everything that is means.  I love the way it causes people to look outside of themselves and find ways to give.  I love the sparkly lights.  I love the way my kids eyes light up to the gifts under the tree.  I love trying to find that perfect gift for someone to surprise them with.  I love walking by my nativity and stopping to see a sweet precious baby in the manger.  I love Christmas music 24/7.  I also love being married to Santa Claus.  That's the best part!  :)
I'm a huge giver.  I find joy in giving to others.  I'm pretty sure God created me that way.  This year I haven't been able to give too much due to a lack of funds.  So, God has taught me this year how to sit back and receive.  For someone like me, that's hard.  But this year has been full of hard lessons, so why did I think this was going to be any easier?  :)  God has wanted me to sit back and receive so that I could fully see how He is providing for me and my family.  And it's amazing to see God's hand when you are still and watch.
Here are some things I have received this December just by being still:
$100 grocery card from my bestest friends
$100 from my parents best friends
$200 Walmart card from my dad's Sunday School class
A Christmas ham from my bestest friends (I have some AWESOME friends)
Cookies galore from friends and neighbors! ( I have hardly had to bake anything this year!)
Christmas soaps which I LOVE (yes, God does care about the little silly details of our lives)
Airline points which we never use in order to buy Christmas presents!  (who would've thought?!)
$50 movie gift card
A friend offering to make New Years Eve dinner (that was a huge deal for me!)
And SO many other things that have blessed my heart beyond all meaning.
I have found Christmas this year not in giving, but in receiving God's provisions for my family.  He has shown us ALL year that He is here.  Emmanuel, God with us (present tense).  Now, I hope to not make this receiving thing a permanent thing because I am wired to give, but I think God wanted me to feel the benefits of it this year.  If you feel God prompting you to give anything to anyone, please heed His call!  You will bless someone more than you can ever know! 
Santa Claus has come to town!  At least to the Corsars house.  And God has been here, too.  Good thing He doesn't only come around once a year!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Your Camel is Coming!

So, I posted this photo on my Facebook page and told you all I would blog about it's meaning.

The story behind this photo comes from a Joyce Meyer book "Be Anxious for Nothing".  It came from a book study that I led with some gals in my church a few years ago. 

When the angel told Mary she was going to bear God's Son, it had to have been a daunting thought to her!  I'm so poor, I'm not married, I'm not good enough.  She must have thought she needed to better herself in some way before God could use her.  She probably thought she needed to go ahead and enroll Jesus in the best preschool around.  She probably thought she needed to buy the best minivan out there (the new Honda Odyssey) to drive around the Son of God!  And Joseph, we definitely need a bigger house in order to raise God Himself...a house on the golf course!

But instead, Jesus came as a poor baby born in a nasty stable.  I'm sure Joseph, the head of household, the provider, wondered how he was going to provide for this task that God had chosen him to do.  But God already had that figured out, and had already sent some wisemen on camels loaded down with provisions for the child.  Gold, frankincense, and myrrh were extremely valuable gifts in those days.  Only kings had those kinds of gifts.  So, while worrying about how they would provide for Jesus, God was sending the camels with the provisions.  We need only to obediently accept the call God has placed on us...He handles all the rest.

When we start to worry how we are going to do a task that God has placed before us, we just have to remember that our camel is coming and that God is bringing the provisions. 

I was having a pity party to some friends the other day since the 15th is just around the corner and there are no more paychecks coming.  Michael is officially out of the Air Force and looking for a job.  I was telling them that faith is not so easy when you literally have no money.  Faith is pretty easy when you know there is money coming.  But when you can't see it, it's a little more challenging to believe!  My friend who is a graphic artist, headed to work and the next morning placed that sign in my front yard so I would see it when I woke up the next morning.  I stood on my front porch crying that morning  knowing God has not forgotten our need and is already sending the provisions...I just can't see them yet.  I wouldn't be surprised if He delivers it via camel!  :)

"The Lord directs the steps of the godly.  He delights in every detail of their lives."  Psalm 37:23





Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Glory in the Highest

I LOVE Christmas music!  I pulled out all my Christmas CD's the other day and I have about 20 of them!  I like anything from Sinatra to Josh Groban to Chris Botti!  It's all good.  I even have a Clay Aiken Christmas CD, but it's really not my favorite.  hee hee.


My absolute favorite of all my CD's is Chris Tomlin's "Glory in the Highest".  If you haven't gotten it yet, go get it now!  It will bless your socks off this Christmas!  Who would have thought you can actually worship through a Christmas song?  But you can!  Listen to the song "Glory in the Highest" and crank up your volume LOUD!  You'll be transported to heaven.

This year the song is especially meaningful to me.  After the crazy and wild  year that the Corsars have had we are convinced that God will be glorified in the end.  We've had so many things happen to us this year that have not been especially pleasant, but what peace God has given us in the midst of it all.  Peace which passes all understanding.  Glory in the highest.

We have struggled with sadness and sorrow.  But, glory in the highest.  We have been moved from our home, shuffled to another home, lived without our possessions, and finally been firmly planted where God truly wants us.  Glory in the highest.  We have been judged and treated unfairly.  But glory in the highest.  We have had hard decisions to make. Glory in the highest.  We've had to give up things that we truly thought we wanted.  But glory in the highest.  We are now without a job and income waiting on God to show us what His next plan for our life is.  But glory in the highest.  He is the first and the last....He will be our encore!  And you'll want tickets to that show, I promise!  It truly doesn't matter what happens in our life because God has us in the palm of His hand.  He provides.  He sustains.  He is glorified! 

This Christmas season, our prayer for you is that you realize His glory in the highest.  We pray you see God in your good times and you thank him incessantly for your bad times.  If you are His follower, those times were all created just for you.  He is creating you into a new creation.  Something He can use if you let him be your last final act!

video

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Creme Puffs

So, I love stories like these, and I just had to share.  A little background, of course.  As of November 17th, Michael is now finished with the Air Force.  We will stop drawing a paycheck as of December 1st.  That's not that far off in case you haven't realized that December is already here!  Are we worried?  Nope.  We have full faith that God is going to bring the perfect job/career to Michael.  Everything thus far has been this big orchestrated plan that God is putting together, so we feel this is just one more part of the plan. 

Lately, I've been praying the names of God.  He has lots of names that show His character and explain who He is.  He loves when we learn about all the different facets of who He is.  I was studying His name, Jehovah-Jireh, which means God our Provider.  I first learned this name of God many years ago when my dad was out of a job and was praying to Jehovah Jireh to provide for our family.  My dad was so enthralled with this name and attribute of God.  I remember it so vivdly.  God was just storing that tidbit of information in my brain to pull it out and use it now...in 2010, when I would truly need it most.

Jehovah Jireh shows Himself to Abraham in Genesis 22:14 only after Abraham has followed God on an amazing journey that required tons of faith.  I can relate, Abraham.  God showed up and provided for Abraham in a big way!  I have full faith that God will provide for the Corsars right now, too.

So, here's my story.  I'm working in the lunchroom at school on Friday needing to get to the grocery store that afternoon.  Michael reminded me that we are on a strict budget (yes, I need reminding) until he finds a new job.  So, any fun foods at the grocery store are just out for a while.  That's okay.  I can live without Oreos for a season.  :)  The lunchroom had a few leftover tacos.  Tara, lunch lady galore and my wonderful new friend, puts them in a baggie for me along with some salad to take home to my hubby for lunch.  Who says God does not still provide when we ask Him?!  And the best part is that God loves me enough that He even provided creme puffs!  The kids at our school had creme puffs for dessert on Friday...now that's an awesome school, I must say.   And there were some left over, so those got sent home with me as well.  I pray and ask God to provide for my family and what does He give me?  Creme puffs!

God has constantly been reminding me of Matthew 6:26, "Look at the birds. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren't you far more valuable to him than they are?"  God wants the best for us.  He tells us that He has great plans for us; plans to give us a future and a hope!  So, I'm clinging to that promise.  While eating my creme puffs.  I hope that you realize all the provisions God makes for you.  He does provide in just the nick of time.  So, pull up a chair with me, have a creme puff and let's just WAIT on God!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Life Without God

I love callin' up  my momma and chatting with her.  She's my bestest friend in the world.  We were talking last night about my crazy year I've had to endure and about all the trials that have come our way.  Every time I call her it seems I have one more "issue" to tell her about.  It just seems a never ending cycle of challenges in my life right now!  I tell her about an issue, but then I tell her the lesson God is teaching us through a particular challenge.  She asked me, "How would you have handled this past year without God in your life?"  Wow.  What a question.  The Corsars have been through the deepest valley we've ever been through this past year, but what would be different for us if we didn't have God in our life?  I'll be happy to tell you.

If we didn't have God, our loving Heavenly Father, who is Sovereign over all things:
*we would not still be together
*Michael would be in a deep state of depression
*our children would be having nightmares
*we would have NO hope for our future
*we would be miserable
*we would be in family counseling
*laughter and cheerfulness would be gone from our lives
*we would not have a testimony of God's goodness
*we would be bitter toward the Air Force, God, and the church
*we would be extremely lost

Just writing that list almost made me have an anxiety attack just thinking about it.  But God has delivered us from anything that could possibly cause pain in our lives.  Have we had to endure consequences?  Yes.  Have they been painful? Yes.  But a diamond goes through a really refining process that could be viewed as painful as well, and in the end, it is shiny and gorgeous!  And priceless. 

We wanted an object that we could put on our mantle to always remind us of this past year.  We thought the best object that could describe the Corsars in 2010 would be a geode.  They are those rocks that are really ugly on the outside.  Gray and bumpy.  Not very pretty. 

 But when you crack them open, they glimmer with the most gorgeous of colors and crystals on the inside.


We have discovered that what is on the inside of a Corsar is beautiful.  And it's only because God was there forming and creating this beauty.  It was nothing we ever could do on our own.  We would have been content to stay an ugly old gray, bumpy rock.  But God wanted us to be cracked open so the world could see His glory and the beauty of following God!  So, life without God is totally not an option for us.  And I would hope it's not an option for you, either!  Because who wants to stay ugly and bumpy when you can SHINE?!

Monday, October 25, 2010

Is He with you?

I was at Women of Faith this past weekend.  A full weekend of speakers, singers, comedians, girlfriend time, etc.  Two days crammed packed of this.  It's truly amazing.  Last year was my first year and I did not realize I should have brought a ton of kleenex with me for the things that would make me cry!  So, this year, I was armed with kleenex!  When you pray for God to meet you, be prepared.  And have some kleenex.  Because what He shows you is not always pretty.  Things you need to change about yourself.  Things you need to let go of.  Things that He absolutely loves about you that you didn't think was worth loving!

One of the singers this weekend was Mandisa.  Well, I'm a die hard American Idol fan, and I loved her on American Idol.   I hear her on the radio, but have never really heard many of her songs.  So, out come the kleenex when through her God pulls out a song that was written just for me. (There were several of those songs from her which is why I bought her CD!)   I'm sure it touched other ladies as well, but I'm convinced it was written just for me.  :)  If you keep up with my bloggin', you read my last blog about Seasons.  God has really been working with me lately about different seasons of my life.  Time to do this, time to do that.  Timing is right at some times, but not at others.  So, this has been my journey lately.  So, imagine my surprise when she starts this songs off with some of the Ecclesiastes 3 "time for" stuff.  Oh, man!  The water faucets start pouring as I realize God has been with me this entire horrible year of my life. And He will continue to be with me through anything else that falls into my path!

Ever had those moments when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God just pulled up a seat next to you?!  If you haven't...oh, how I pray you will someday experience that.  It takes you to heaven and back.  Although, I haven't come back yet.  I'm still there.  And I plan on staying here.  In God's presence, that is.  I wanted to share the song with you.  I located it on youtube with some words and pretty pictures.  But sometimes just listening to it and inserting the pictures of your own life make things make more sense. 

He is with you!  Just look around...you'll see Him!  But make sure you have your kleenex.

video

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Seasons

I seem to go through this every year.  Every season.  I am alive and vibrant in the summer.  Soaking up the sun and warmth.  Then Fall arrives and slowly my mood is brought back down to earth.  Brought back to a more serene person, which the core of me is not.  So, my bubbly summer self kind of gets trapped under this serene winter exterior.  I'm really struggling with that this year.  I'm fighting against it. 

God reminds us in Ecclesiastes 3 "For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven."  He also reminds me in verse 11 "Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time."  I'm going through a lot of change in my life.  Change just like seasons.  And I'm realizing that to get to enjoy Spring, we have to go through the harshness of Winter.  Spring is so much more amazing after a harsh Winter.  Speaking in metaphors can be confusing, so let me explain with some examples.

Much of 2010 has been one big winter for me.  Disappointments, insecurity, frustration, anger.  Then, God brought deliverance from all that and we are enjoying a nice Spring with a change of our hearts, renewed minds, and did I mention Michael was finally approved to separate from active duty Air Force?!  That's an awesome thing for our family!  I'd like that season of new growth and excitement to last for a while, but hence the seasons constantly change. 

Fall and winter can start to get ugly.  Trees are bare, grass is brown.  I feel this in my spirit at times right now.  A little bare and chilly.  I still know God is with me, please don't misunderstand, but I just feel the winter months settling in on my soul.  Sometimes I think God must bring me here to settle me.  To make me sit still under the blanket of His love.  To sip warm tea with Him by the fire.  To cry with Him and help me get all the bad stuff out of my heart.  Some years my "winters" go on for months, but this year I'd like to find myself into an early spring.  And this year, I'd like to really find God in all the seasons of my life.  I'd like to notice Him in the Fall and find beauty in something that I usually don't see as beautiful.  I'd really like to look for Him in the winter, when I feel absolutely abandoned. 

"God makes everything beautiful for its own time".   God is making Becky beautiful for a time He has appointed for her to shine.  Feel free to remind me of that as you see me this fall and winter.  You, too, are being made beautiful for your season.  I'll remind you of that when I see you, too.

Every Season by Nichole Nordeman

Friday, October 8, 2010

Humility

Well, here I sit with coffee breath, humbled.  I have learned yet another lesson today.  My year has been chalked full of them, and I'm grateful that the learning never ceases to end.  I think the day I stop learning, I'll be dead.  One thing I learned today is I'm definitely NOT perfect.  I also learned that I have some awesome friends in my life who God uses to speak truth to me.  I'm just hoping I'm as awesome a friend to them as they are to me. 

I am passionate about standing up for my friends' when they have been hurt.  I don't like when people get their feelings hurt, so I really try to put all the pieces back together.  But later, when you learn the whole story (or the other side) of a situation, you see that it's really not your battle to pick. So, I'm laying down my sword of righteous anger and from now on letting God  handle it.  I believe that's His job anyway.  Forgive me Lord for getting in the way.  You see the mess I've made by getting in the way, so I'm stepping back now.  From now on, I will pray for God's grace to cover Christian messes to fix them.  That's what Joyce Meyer calls messes we Christians like to get ourselves into.  I tend to step into other people's messes.  I'm sure I create my own whirlwind of Christian messes as well.  I'm pretty sure we all do.  "For all have sinned and fallen short of God's glory"  Romans 3:23

I am humbled and sorry for my actions that have caused pain in my friends.  By trying to stand up for some friends, I inadvertently hurt others.  Apparently, I fell off the balance board this time. 

Thankfully, God is still passionately in love with me.  And His grace covers a multitude of sins.  Mine.  Yours.  Everyones.  I prayed to God last night and asked Him to reveal Himself to me in mighty way.  He did that today at Starbucks.  He reminded me that He is with me every single hobbling step of the way.  He pulls me out of the mire and sets me back onto a firm foundation.  "So after you have suffered a little while, He will restore, support, and strengthen you and He will place you on a firm foundation."  1 Peter 5:10

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Razzle dazzle, man.

I'm reading a book that has me literally L(ing)OL every day!  If you are a Christian and you have been around other Christians or in church, this book will make you crack up!  It's not poking fun at Christians, but it is.  In a fun way.  All groups of people have things they do that are familiar.  Stereotypes, maybe it's called.  The book is called "Stuff Christians Like" by Jonathan Acuff.  There is also a blog that is super funny at stuffchristianslike.net

Laughing at yourself is healthy.  Laughing at your own stereotypes can be healthy, too.  So, I want to share with you the funniest thing I've read in the book thus far.  At least funniest to me.  You may read it and find something funnier, but that's your humor, not mine.  Get your own blog! 

Have you ever had a problem and sought out someone and asked them to pray for you?  As Christians we usually say, "Yes, I'll pray for you."  But do you really?  Sometimes we just say that to make people feel better.  Or we say it when we can't think of anything else to say.  How about instead of saying we'll pray for someone and not doing it, that we just start saying something else.  Next time your friend comes to you with a prayer request and you know you won't be making time to pray for them, just say, "Razzle dazzle, man.  Razzle dazzle." It should be awkwardly funny to say the least. 

Or if you are uncomfortable with that, maybe try actually making time to pray for your friend.  It's amazing the things God will do when we pray for His intervention!  Razzle dazzle, man.  Razzle dazzle.

Friday, September 10, 2010

OK, OK, I'm back!

I blogged once for the first time a few months ago.  Then I got caught up in the remodeling of my house (painting, decorating, painting, arranging furniture).  Then Michael had surgery on his ankle so I've had to take on the task of nursemaid...which I'm not very good at, by the way.  Blogging fell by the wayside.  But after much prodding from a few friends and a final call from my daddy, I'm back!  My dad asked me to give my daughter, Alex, rights to my blogsite so she could blog since I wasn't doing it.  So, apparently you ALL are hanging on the words I write.  :)  So, here goes:

I was at Bible Study the other night laughing with my girlfriends, eating yummy homemade treats and drinking coffee when God decided to show up.  I love when He just "shows up", by the way.  It's awesome.  We're reading through our lesson when I'm asked to look up this verse, 1 Peter 5:10.  "In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Jesus Christ.  So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation."  If you don't believe that God's Word is living and alive, well, I feel sorry that you don't get to experience that!  So many Christians don't feel that God speaks to them.  When I hear that, I wonder if that person is reading God's Word.  It's amazing what He'll say to you if you are actually searching for Him in the Bible.

Anyway, what a verse for me!  Sometimes I think the verses in the Bible were written just for Becky Corsar. :)  2010 has been a year FULL of suffering for the Corsars.  We are hoping and praying that the suffering and waiting is almost over.  But even if it's not, it's okay.  Through the pain and suffering God has restored, supported, and made us some of the strongest people you'll ever meet!  And the foundation we are built upon is the strongest it has ever been.  Not that I ever want to go through a year like 2010 again, but I'm thankful for the year 2010.  Growing into what God desires for you is painful.  It requires pruning, snipping, sacrificing, but the end result is so stinkin' amazing!  I welcome anything that God brings our way in 2011.  But I won't be praying for anything specific.  We're just along for the ride and willing to go and do anything God requires of us.  We are definitely back!

Monday, August 16, 2010

Starting Over in the Same Place

2010 has been an incredible year for the Corsars.  Well, I'm not sure that "incredible" is the word I'm looking for, but something along those lines.  Other words that could be substituted there would be crazy, unpredictable, depressing, exhilarating, exhausting, confusing, calm, chaotic...well, you get the picture.  A roller coaster year, that's for sure.  And it's only August!  :)

It all began in January when we put our house on the market because we had orders to go to Germany!  WOW!  We were so excited.  Starting to learn the language.  Looking for houses to live in there.  Getting rid of things we couldn't take overseas.  Starting to disconnect from our life here in Grand Forks (since that's what you  do to be able to survive emotionally in the military with all these moves!) Got the car shipped to Germany, sold our house in less than a month, the movers packed up all our household goods on that freezing February day, then HALT!!!!

Michael is the most amazing military man in the entire US Air Force.  He has many awards, he has much integrity, he is truly amazing.  But he made a mistake on a cold February day and it cost us our move to Germany.  The journey we have been on since February until this hot day in August has been incredible.  My dad encouraged me with this little tidbit of wisdom.  "You never know what someone is carrying around in their bucket until it gets bumped".  I saw incredible things fall out of the Corsar Family 4's buckets.

We could easily have spilled hatred, ugliness, shame, blaming, yelling, insults, etc.  But I saw my family come together and spill love, compassion, forgiveness, prayer, unconditional love, & acceptance.  Not just the fabulous foursome of Corsars, but my ENTIRE family!  And not just my blood family, but my church family as well.

God has forgiven, redeemed, blessed, and now called the Corsars to a life far greater than we would have had in Germany!  God kept us here for a reason.  Michael needed some pride to be purged from his life, Becky needed to be still and let God be God, Alex needed to learn a valuable lesson in trust and provision, and Evan needed to see just how big our God is!  I could write 1,000 pages of the lessons we have learned since February, but they all seem so intimate and fresh to us right now, that I think I'll save those for another time.  I do want to share with you a verse that has sustained the Corsar Family 4 for the past 6 months of trial.  "The steps of the godly are directed by the Lord.  He delights in every detail of their lives."  Psalm 37:23

Every stinkin' step of the way, God has cared for every little detail!  Incredible is the only word I can think of to describe it!  I look forward to sharing our lessons with you throughout my new found hobby of blogging!  Michael has been called to start preaching, so I think I'll start blogging!  :)  God brought us to it and He brought us through it.  We are on the final swing of this leg of our journey, but many more lessons are around the next bend. 

So, we are still in Grand Forks.  Starting over in the same place...just a few blocks from our old house.  Every little detail, I tell ya.  Incredible.